Friday, July 31, 2009

I'm so excited for Warped Tour tomorrow! I can't wait. It's the only thing I've really been looking forward to this summer. I get to see All Time Low and Escape the Fate! XD Yay! And it's just a day to be free, which is what I love most about it. Freedom. I get to spend an entire day and night with Gabby and Tyler and we can do whatever we want, no hovering parents or other people to worry about.
Also, my dad is currently out of town. He's in San Francisco. I spent the entire day with my mom today and it was so amazing... It reminded me of when I was younger. We had fun, just being together. God, I love her so much. I wish we were still back in our little yellow house, sharing a bed and a life that was just ours. No dad, no other siblings. That was awesome. It was us against the world, and I miss it. I love my mom more than anything.

Oh, andandand, I got my pictures developed! From that big awesome chunky film camera. There were only about two that I liked, but whatever. Actually, my favorite was one I accidentally snapped of Kyrstin when she came over. It's like a "don't look at me" thing. Idk, I like it. I'll post it sometime. (: I got more film, so I'll be shooting a lot more hopefully.

So I'm just sitting here babysitting two girls, a four year old named Tessa and a two year old named Jorie. They're absolutely adorable and they behaved really well. The parents said they would be home around 12:30 and the girls went to sleep an hour ago, so I have another 3 to 4 hours of boredom. But I don't care... Life is currently good. (:

Posted by Alex at 7:00 PM

Monday, July 27, 2009

I'm... slipping.

The highway overpass, the self abuse, and the urges to just take something and drift away from everyone, everything.

And Tyler. I love that boy so much and I'm suddenly petrified that I'll lose him. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because... that thing.... the stupid nagging sentence I can never forget that says he, and every guy, will eventually leave me if I'm not good enough. And I've already been "not good enough" for a while, with not going to Zero and totally freaking out in front of him at Pizza Hut. God, and I kicked Zack. What a stupid little bitchy whore. And if he only knew about Friday.... Yeah. Right. Whatthefuckever. I ruin everything. He would have never said the things he did if he knew.

Anyways. I guess I've kinda been burying that and it just came to the surface. I'm actually in a fairly good mood. I've been with Gabby and Tyler a lot the past three days, and Warped Tour is coming up. Dakota is still being psycho ex but I can handle it. I really wish I had a job, because I'm in desperate need of money. As usual, My emotions are crazy and I can never tell where they're going. I don't know what's wrong with me. Zack is totally confusing me and I never seem to have enough time to see the people I want to see and do the things I want to do.... I love my parents a lot, but I suddenly can't wait to move out. I don't know why. And I'm getting fat.

I got my school schedule today... It's a pretty good schedule, but I'm still absolutely dreading going back to that hellhole.

G'night, blogspot.

Posted by Alex at 10:20 PM

Saturday, July 18, 2009

I got to see Kyrstin today! Yay! We went to Barnes&Noble. It was good. We're hanging out again sometime next week. (By the way, you have good boobs! I promise!) And I am now in love with the Post Secret book thing.

I get to go to Zero next week. XD SO excited! I love Tyler. :) Though I'm pissed because I just found out DJ Caffeine is playing there tonight, and I LOVE him, and I'm missing it. :( Whatever. I is happy.

Posted by Alex at 7:18 PM

Wednesday, July 1, 2009


That's Kevin. He's fifteen adn in love with me. He's a really sweet kid, and he's better than Dane Cook at standup. I'm staying with him and going to the Bahamas with him and his family.

He's on his way to the Bahamas right now, while I'm not, because of what happened on the plane. I don't feel like retyping, so I'm copying it from a bulletin I posted on Myspace.

If you know me at all, you know that I have a huge phobia of needles. So I'm sitting quietly on the plane, reading a book about a girl that needs a heart transplant. Then they started talking about medical procedures and blood and needles. And I started to get dizzy. At first I thought I'd be fine, but then it got worse, and I felt like I was dying. So I got up to go to the bathroom and the flight attendant started thrieking about how I had to sit down. I got upset and started yelling back because I was feeling even worse. And when I faint, it's horrible Really, dreadfully, horrible. I sometimes have seizures. Anyway, the lady gives me a tiny useless puke bag and sends me back to my seat. But Katie, one of the people I'm with, starts saying how horrible I look, soo... The flight attendant calls off the fucking flight and makes the paramedics come get me. Yeah. Since I'm a minor, they wanted to take me to the hospital. But we somehow got out of that. I can't get another flight till 7 AM tommorow, so I have to wake up at 2 AM again. All of my clothes and belongings are currently on their way to Florida, then Freeport. And all of this happedned before 8:30 AM.

So, that's my day so far! I will hopefully be on my way the Bahamas at this time tomorrow. Without anymore medical incidents.

Posted by Alex at 8:14 AM